Mar 20, 2019
Perspective.
So lately I’ve been feeling pretty overwhelmed and stressed. I haven’t had much alone time (I’m very much of an introvert) and the book we’re going over in class is pretty heavy.
This morning in chapel however, the Lord gave me a vision (I promise I’m not weird). Before taking Holy Communion, Bishop Danny asked us to close our eyes and quiet our hearts to prepare ourselves. So knowing that is definitely something I need to do and take advantage of in the midst of this busy schedule, I started imagining myself in an empty white room… Sort of. You know in movies when characters are dreaming and they’re in that white abyss? Exactly like that. There was no up and down, or left and right. There was only white. Bright white everywhere. Did I make that clear enough? So as I’m standing there in the nothingness, Jesus appears in His white robe and wounds in His hand and feet. Jesus Christ, my Lord and King was just standing there in front of me in all of His glory and beauty.
Well, you know how people always ask the question of “What would you do when you see Jesus?” A lot of the times you get an answer like, “The first thing I’d do is ask Him…”
My first instinct was to fall down. I was not worthy. I fell to my knees with my head bowed but it wasn’t low enough. I couldn’t get low enough. I got on my face and started kissing His feet and His wounds that He endured through for ME. All I wanted to do was show Him how much I loved Him. He lifted me up and I fell into His chest, hugging Him and crying… but I felt no shame or embarrassment. There was only love there. Just being in His presence, I had no doubts or fears. I knew this Man loved every part of me with everything in Him. And all I could do was cry because for the first time ever, I knew He would keep me safe and never let me go or give up on me. I could literally feel Jesus’ love radiating from His warm embrace. It felt so tangible, like I could touch it and take it with me everywhere I went. And He just sat there with me, holding and comforting me. No words, nothing needed to be said. But I wasn’t crying because of everything on my mind. No, I was crying because of who Jesus is. In fact, none of those negative feelings or sadness came to mind once. The focus was 100% on Him and who He is.
And so in the midst of feeling discouraged and depressed because I’m not where I want to be spiritually, my Lord showed me the real focus. He also showed me that my first instinct was to fall down before the King and kiss His wounds. So despite my feelings, I’m not failing at all. It’s just a tough season, but on this day, I got a little more perspective, and that is what’s getting me through it.
Read about what another School of Discipleship student learned in the midst of discouragement.
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Dec 2, 2016
“He comes to His garden to enjoy its fruit.” – Chuck Smith
The Christian is saved by believing and trusting in God. This produces fruit in their life. 
Yet so often I get confused and think producing fruit is what saves me or gives me a better standing before God and others.
But think of a tree: this tree produces fruit faithfully every year. Its fruit does nothing for the tree. If the tree depended on its fruit it would die. The fruit is only good for the enjoyment of others and for producing more trees. So what then saves the tree? The water and nutrients in the soil! The tree did nothing to put them there, nor can it maintain them there. It only connects itself to them and trusts that they will give it all it needs and by them it is able to produce fruit.
Before coming to School of Discipleship, I struggled often with wanting my works to be recognized by others and by God. I wanted to be noticed and known. I still do. I see pride creeping up in my heart probably every day. But the months I’ve spent away from home in this community environment have taught me a few things:
God showed me the ugliness of my sin; that there was nothing good in my heart, and that though I longed to change, I could not. He also taught me that He still loved me, no matter how sinful I am and that He wanted to change me if I would let Him. I was humbled over and over again in watching the selflessness of others, in the way they loved God and served me as well. 
I knew I wasn’t like them, but I wanted to be and as I strive to be more others-focused, I find a greater joy.
St. Paul said this to the Philippians:
“But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but which is through faith in Christ – the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith.” Philippians 3:7-9
I know I’m not there yet. I haven’t lost all things for Christ-there are many things I hang onto, thinking and hoping they will do me some good. But as C.S. Lewis says, “Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead.”
I pray that I can give away all things and be able to say like St. Paul, “I consider them garbage that I may gain Christ.”
I want to be “like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season and whose leaf does not wither” and in this way may the fruit that my relationship with Christ produces bring glory and enjoyment to God.
Written by a Discipleship Program Student
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Nov 18, 2016
1 Cor 12:12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ.” I am learning what it is like to be part of the body of Christ and it all started when I began my journey in the Discipleship Program of Gospel for Asia. Though it has been challenging at times I am finding it to be worth the growing pains, with that I will begin to tell how this came to be.
Imagine with me if you can…
Being rudely awakened by an alarm going off at 5 am across the room, knowing it’s not your own, you are somewhat annoyed. Then having the person hit snooze who knows how many times or not even hearing the alarm at all; but now you’re awake when you wanted to sleep till 5:55 am, which would have given you enough time to grab your bible and run up the stairs in time for family devotions at 6:00 am. But now you’re wide awake because she didn’t turn it off herself, what will you do? Be upset or extend grace and take the opportunity to spend more time with the Lord? You lie there thinking: If this is how the first few days are, what will it be like for eleven months and will you be able to handle it??
After a few months of getting to know each other and living together you start to realize just how blessed you are and how much you have grown in your character, your walk with the Lord, love for each other and how God has used each lovely lady to shape your life.
Though it may have been a scary thought at first to think of living with six other ladies it has turned out to be a growing experience, filled with both joys and sorrows. Who would have known that living in close quarters with people who were strangers at first could have become sisters and friends? These precious sisters have helped me to become more like Christ by their lives and examples of love and grace.
By living in a community setting I am learning what it is like to love, forgive, and extend grace. There are many opportunities to spur one another on toward love and good deeds, like it says in Heb 10. Daily we can learn more about God, each other and ourselves and what it is like to be the bride of Christ in one body with many different parts. I am truly grateful to be part of Gospel For Asia’s Discipleship Program. I have seen how the staff lives out what we have learned in our books and messages; they have shown me what it is like to be a unified body of Christ as each one fulfills their role in Christ. Col 3:12-15 has taken on new meaning as I’ve seen it lived out and I’ve been able to be part of it too.
Written by a Discipleship Program Student
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Jul 1, 2016
Growing up I spent a lot of time reading about wars our country fought in history books and stories of soldiers who gave their all for their country. The sacrifice that they showed for their country was a great influence on me, but I am afraid the concept of fighting for something no matter what it costs others also influenced me too greatly. I saw the glory of being a hero, while ignoring how much it has the potential of hurting others.
Throughout Scripture we have many instances of the Christian life illustrated in a military manner. Such as: weapons of our warfare II Corinthians 10:4; Armour of God Ephesians 6:11-18; fighting the good fight of faith I Timothy 6:12, there are many other examples as well. However while I emphasized in my mind this side of Christianity I ignored other Scriptures such as “Matthew 9:13 Go and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”, or Micah 6:8 He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”.
As a result of ignoring these verses as well as others, I have run roughshod over many people, far too many. The result was that I hurt many people in my life that the Lord had placed there for me to minister to. Because of this militaristic mindset, I began fighting for what I saw as the truth no matter who it hurt. The result of this was that I began alienating myself from many of my fellow believers. In a conversation with someone about three years ago, he pointed out to me that I was not showing love in a particular situation, but rather I was being harsh on several individuals. He was right, but I refused to receive what he was saying. In fact I took it as a badge of honour that someone was criticizing me for doing what was “right”.
Recently God has been opening my eyes and showing me what it looks like to love. For a long time, God has been teaching me how he loves me, but now he is instructing me in how to love others. One of the major ways is by serving others as Galatians 5:13 instructs us. Another is showing compassion on those who have not come to the same maturity as I believe I have in a certain area. I have also come to realise that I cannot have my own personal interpretation of Scripture. Many times I take how I understand Scripture as the standard and I get frustrated and judgemental if others do not see it the same way. The Christian life does indeed have military parallels of fighting to the end. However, in pursuing this end we must remember to have compassion, mercy and love for others.
—School of Discipleship student
School of Discipleship CA
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Jun 10, 2014
“… if we are faithless, he remains faithful—for he cannot deny himself.” 2 Timothy 2:13
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6
“The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; Do not forsake the works of Your hands.” Psalm 138:8
“… just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love…” Ephesians 1:4
“Now to Him who is able to keep youfrom stumbling, And to present you faultless Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy…” Jude 24
How many more promises need to be made by a God who is incapable of lying before I will believe Him? My Friend has promised that He will always be with me, yet somehow, I would rather try to do things on my own. The work I’ve been called to do is not mine, but His. He will perfect everything that concerns me. He will do it because He is faithful.
So, what role do I play in this?
“But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.” Jude 20-21
“For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls.” Hebrews 12:3
“Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.” Hebrews 3:15
“Therefore let that abide in you which you heard from the beginning. If what you heard from the beginning abides in you, you also will abide in the Son and in the Father. And this is the promise that He has promised us—eternal life.” – 1 John 2:24-25
Abba, convince us of Your goodness, please. Convince us that You are for us, that You love us, and that no matter what we do, Your heart towards us never changes. Convince us that Your grace is true, and that all You require of us is to be weak, and willing to receive You in our weakness. Convince us, Papa, that when we are weak, You are strong. It’s what You’ve promised.
Teach us to believe You, and teach us to receive Your love. Teach us that you are trustworthy.
Thank You for allowing us to come before You in complete confidence. Thank You for sending Jesus to be our Hope, our Redemption, our Sanctification, our Righteousness, our LIFE.
Faithful Father, teach us how to love you. Through Jesus I ask this, amen.
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